Friday, 20 June 2008


I fell asleep reading last night, and stuttered awake about 3am to turn off the light. I was unnerved when I spotted that the bedroom walls and ceiling were caked in a forest of tiny - yet evil - green insects. I presumed I was hallucinating and went off to sleep.

This morning, it would seem that they were in fact very real. For reasons I can't explain they are all dead now. Maybe it was a suicide pact. In case it's still pretty revolting. The entire floor surface of my flat looks like this.

Whilst I'm more than happy to hoover the bastards up today, I can't make this part of my daily routine. Will it happen again? Why my flat? What are they? Will it be a plague of locusts tomorrow?

In other news, Dr Raj Persaud looks like he'll be struck off today for plagiarism. Just a general question - does taking someone's song and changing the words count as plagiarism?


pocahontas said...


my reaction would probably consist of locating their nest, destroying it cold-heartedly and spend my entire payment on insect killing stuff ! or move : would not be able to sleep thinking they could creep up on me whenever they feel like filling up on some human skin :-)

but hoovering is also effective, and less OCD-ish. muahaha x

MadOldBat said...

aren't you assuming not presuming?Also depends on whether parody is plagiarism (can you give the link so we can decide?)
Also you promised more info re NZ- have to say it is the only thing tempting me to go so how much work are you actually doing there?

Michael said...

Sounds to me like you could be up before the GMC any day now!ev

Anonymous said...


Don't worry about them filling up on your skin. They're far more interested in crawling up your nose and in your ears....


Don't hoover. Get a baby, let it crawl around the floor!



Anonymous said...

Not when you give them a writing credit its not. for example:

Words (Adam Kay and Suman Biswas)
Music (J. Blunt (coughWANKERcough)

faith said...

Its probably just the beginning of some kind of greenfly army- or you left your window open and a light on and they flew in... or you smell of shit and they were attracted to you.

I also read the Dr.Raj is trying to claim that he was mentally confused at the time which is why he did it. Maybe they need to ask a psychiatrist. Oh.

Anonymous said...

And? Was there a plague of locusts today? If so, the Almighty may have sent them as a subtle hint to forgo postings like "Upsettingly, this is a true story" and "Two things" in the future. THOSE were "Yuk"!